Scattered pieces

Welcome to our new blog.

I apologise for the apparent haste in the move, I made an error in the timing of the importation of the blog from the old account.  This has been compounded by the others not really liking this template, so it will probably change when they find one they prefer.  I’m also still learning the processes behind hosting a blog with the associated joys of file transfers etc.  It’s been an interesting process to get the blog this far – as well as a much needed distraction.

Hopefully the teething problems will be sorted out shortly and they can get back to the much needed release and processing of ideas they achieve through blogging.

As a librarian, we are used to researching and finding the answers to our questions.  As a person with a dissociative disorder, the need for reliable information is high, but the quality of the information available is mixed.  It is easy to search for one aspect of dissociation and get a range of resources that run the spectrum from ridiculous and insulting, through to peer reviewed, balanced debates or research.

We have another blog called Scattered Pieces about the struggles, challenges and joy that the dissociation can cause.   So this blog will not concentrate on that aspect of our life, but more the questions that result from those experiences.  This will solely be our opinion on the pieces found.  We’ve been librarians for 10 years now, so know about evaluating information.  But we also have the disorder, so have a bias as to what fits for us and how it influences our world view.  As with any information you find on the Internet, you should question its validity and the motivations for publishing it in a public forum.

Here we go…

As indicated in the profile, we’re a Dissociative Identity Disorder system that has been built up over the last 37 years to protect a little girl who was hurt by people who should have protected her. We were first given this diagnosis over 3 years ago and still struggle to accept it as a reality. Yes classic denial… But who wouldn’t want to deny a known history that is littered with abuse?

I’m very aware that as soon as the DID diagnosis is mentioned, there are those who will sit in judgement of whether the person claiming to be DID is a “faker” or attention seeking person with Borderline Personality Disorder. While I feel no real need to justify myself, and what we as a system experience, I will state that we’ve been tested for BPD and the other personality disorders and found not to meet the criteria for any of them. As a system we are high functioning and keep a full-time job, pay taxes, avoid hospitals, keep appointments and generally are just like anyone else out there. So there’s no gain from me stating that I am part of a DID system. None of us are expecting any attention from writing to this blog, the only motivation for the blog is to try to express our experiences so that we can understand it further.

So why write a public blog? Strangely enough it will be one of the only ways to force the writing to occur. Have tried maintaining a private journal with no success and this may fail as well – who knows?

The first time we were aware that we might be different from other little girls is when the father told us to stop talking in all the funny voices. It was just the different parts speaking as themselves, which we then understood to be bad. Because of this we created a part to act as our spokesperson – problem solved.

Will see if we write anymore…